Vahniya White Gets Ethnic

©2011 by Idel Dorléans


The other day I was having lunch with a group of friends for our regular monthly meet up when a sudden commotion erupted.  Before any of us knew what was happening, there was Vahniya White reading the riot act to miss Noe Tall.  Apparently Noe had gotten into Vahniya's business regarding her man, something you just don’t do.  You see, Vahniya’s one of those seemingly quiet and pleasant souls who always has a smile on her face and never a bad word about anyone.  So it came as a surprise when she started rolling her head and saying, “Oh!  No you didn’t” then followed up with a, “and who do you think you are, miss thang …”


We all looked at one other and actually mouthed, did she say “miss thang?”  We were not sure if we heard right.  But here, standing in front of us and the world, was our mild mannered Vahniya White making a spectacle of herself in public and, dare we say, acting very ethnic; this coming from a woman who always crosses her T’s and never forgets to dot her I’s. 


I knew this couldn’t go on because she will certainly hate herself once she calmed down.  I quietly motioned to Traipod to rescue Noe; a rare occasion, indeed, to see her speechless. I grabbed Vahniya, hugged her tightly and steered her outdoors. Poor thing was trembling with fury.  Once we made it outside, the cold wind had a calming effect on her and, as expected, she looked at me in horror and started to sob.


“Oh, Kalmur, I cannot believe I said all these mean things to Noe.  I’m such a horrible person.” she sobbed, “I should go apologize to her right this minute, but Ohhhh! I can never go back in there and show my face.  Everyone must hate me.”


“Calm down Vahny, she probably got what she deserved.” I looked her over and suppressed a smile. She caught my look and started getting red in the face, but I didn’t give her a chance to say anything. “No one hates you. As a matter of fact, you probably scored some points with them since you are the only one to ever put Noe in her place.”


She looked at me very indignantly and I couldn’t take it anymore and just started laughing.  Because I knew her better than anyone in the group I knew I could take certain liberties, and realizing that, she also began to laugh.


“Well, I guess she did have it coming. I mean can you believe the nerve of that girl?  Sticking her nose in my personal business, telling me how I should act with MY Pilaer!”


No good, she was working herself up to a tizzy again. “Oh honey, don’t let her get under your skin.  In spite of her having something to say for everything, she does mean well and has your best interest at heart.  Why don’t you take a few deep breaths so we can go back in before they start talking.”  I let her calm down a little more before leading her back into the café.


When we got back to the table, Noe had a hanged dog look on her face and what looked like tears in her eyes.  Vahniya walked up to her and opened her arms and Noe fell into them as they both cried. 


I think we were all relieved to get back to our various conversations as we drank our wine and pondered over today’s events.